Ok, apparently this month is all about Abbie. On Thursday, just as I was leaving the house with a whole day stuff planned. I got a call from Abbie at school, which was weird because she is not allowed to use her new cell phone during school hours. I thought that she said "Mom, I have a "B" in English." Ok, that was weird so I said "what?" and then I thought she said "Mom, I have a bee in my ear." Ok, that was even weirder. So then she handed the phone to her teacher who said, "Mrs. Feller, Abbie has a pinto bean stuck in her ear." WHAT???? I was laughing so hard I nearly ran off the road. Remember, Abbie just turned 14 (see previous blogs) - she is not 2. Her teacher then said that I needed to come pick her up because they couldn't get the bean out and we needed to take her to the doctor for the extraction.
So, I turned around and went to the school. When I got to the school, Abbie and her teacher were in the office filing an "accident report." Apparently, Abbie had been doing a lab in science class. Her teacher (who is very good) was walking through the room checking on the students' progress and stopped at Abbie's table and jokingly said: "Abbie, you guys are doing a good job - have a pinto bean!" (The pinto beans were left over from a previous lab and the teacher had one in her hand.) Abbie responded - jokingly "Thanks Ms. Darwazeh. I will treasure it always." Then she started playing with the bean. In an effort to find someplace to keep the bean she discovered that it fit nicely into the crease in her outer ear and showed her teacher that she would carry it there with her always.
Then, when Abbie went to get the pinto bean out (since she really didn't mean she'd "always" carry it) she accidently flicked it into her ear canal. OOPS! They tried to get it out using the tweasers they use for disecting frog and eyeballs, but just succeeded in lodging it further in the ear. At this point they decided to call me.
So, Abbie went to the office to wait for me and fill out the accident report. In the office she ran into her 6th grade teacher who laughed hard and told Abbie to tell everyone it was a mexican jumping bean that jumped into her ear. We tried this, but no one believed it. I picked her up and called the doctor's office. They could not fit her in until 11:30, so we went home for an hour. While at home we had a the brilliant idea to try to vacuum the bean out. That did not work but made for fun photos.
So, at 11:30 we showed up at the doctors office. The medical assistent who took us to the exam room asked us why we were there and when we told her she made a valiant, but unsuccessful, effort not to laugh. Enter doctor #1 who, after a good chuckle, proceeded to try to "scoop" the bean out using what Abbie called "sharp objects." We discovered that the ear is a sensitive area of the body and this was very uncomfortable (excruciatingly painful). So, she decided to get another doctor to "consult." Enter doctor #2 - who looks in her ear and promptly refers us to the local Ear, Nose and Throat (ENT) doctor.
So, we get back in the car and drive across town to see the ENT (he didn't remember, but he put tubes in Daniel's ears and took Abbie's tonsils out). After a long wait - because they had to squeeze us in between appointments, his medical assistant/nurse took us to our exam room, made a valiant, but unsuccessful, effort not to laugh and then went to get the doctor. Enter doctor #3. As he entered the room, he asked Abbie if she had put in chips and salsa also or if the bean was alone. Then, he got his trusty sharp metal object and after examining said bean and poking around for a while, was able to get it out. YEAH!
Abbie asked to keep the bean (which was weird, but what wasn't that day?). The doctor said that it is not unusual for him to pull things out of people's ears, but that the average age of those patients was about 2. We are now the proud owners of a $30 pinto bean (the cost of the copays - I don't even want to know what the total bill is). So, we snapped a picture of the good doctor and then we did what any normal people would do and went for Mexican food for lunch - where we ate - pinto beans. There is justice in the world.
One final note - Abbie has a great sense of humor and has been able to laugh with the rest of us - and we are still laughing. Also, her whole school knows about it and she has become something of a legend. She plans on framing the bean and giving it to her teacher.
Here is a song ("Beans in my Ears") for the occasion:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KZw7lWd1btQ
7 comments:
That is an OUTRAGEOUS tale. So glad it all ended well. Abbie, you should have gone to Grandpa. He once spent the better part of a Saturday afternoon fishing wax deposits out of my ear--at Grandma Walter's house, of all places! I remember screaming in pain, and he took a secret delight in torturing me, I know. To this day, I don't know why he took it upon himself to probe my ears! But I'm sure he considers himself qualified to perform bean extraction too.
March 17, 2008 9:02 AM
hey this is meili!!!!
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
that is so funny! I love the framing idea. talk to me on IM Abbie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Happy belated Birthday to Abbie! Also, I am so relieved to hear that the bean was able to be extracted. Relief! It sounds like you all are living the wild California rock star lives that I expect of you. :) Hope all is well!
hey abbie! remember me! meili's next door neighbor jessica! ha ha ha. oh yeah and happy birthday!
hey abbie this is meili again and she reminded me to say happy birthday. heh heh. oops. well HAPPY BIRTHDAY DARLING!!!! best of luck in the coming months. jk im having this sudden severe craving for pinto beans....well i'm about done writing this so tata have a dandy one
It's great to read the story. Although, hearing it over the phone was priceless! What a great way to become a legend in school.
I'm laughing so hard, Abbie!
You crack me up--glad to know you're safe!!
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